The Poet Laureate of Crime

The cream of crime were gathered at St Bartholomew the


To bid a fond farewell to an esteemed associate

A mastermind, a leader of men, a father, a brother cellmate

Whose criminal intelligence once made a robbery great

This Royalty of Ruffians with necks as thick as thieves

And barely one unbroken nose among them

Stood up in church with voices loud enough to rattle the


And with all their vast and villainous hearts they sang

‘Abide With Me’

Through incense clouds they hoisted him above the ancient


Evading Scotland Yard for the very last time

They bowed their heads, and ladies wept as he moved down

the line

A first class send-off for the Poet Laureate of Crime